ONLY FOOLS AND HORSES: THE MUSICAL
Theatre Royal Haymarket, London SW1
Opened 19 February, 2019
***

I wasn’t a fan of TV sitcom Only Fools And Horses. Serious young man that I was in the 1980s, I saw the ambitions and misfortunes of Peckham-based “independent trader” (i.e. huckster) Del Boy Trotter and his plonker of a brother Rodney as an endorsement rather than a parody of Thatcherite entrepreneurialism, and was also uncomfortable with what seemed to me to be principally comedy of embarrassment. Of course I feel a bit of a Charlie now it’s one of Britain’s best-loved series of all time, so I went to its West End stage musical première willing to be converted. In the end, I got part-way there.

The series’ creator and writer John Sullivan died shortly after beginning work on this adaptation; Chas Hodges of “Rockney” duo Chas & Dave, who co-wrote some of the songs, has also shuffled off prematurely. The work has been completed by Sullivan’s son Jim and comedian Paul Whitehouse, who also appears as Grandad (and, briefly, hiding behind a bushy beard as Uncle Albert). The action is set in 1989, with its narrative being drawn from episodes and Christmas TV specials around the same time: the main strands are Rodney’s wedding to the long-suffering Cassandra and Del Boy’s first dates with the implausibly forgiving Raquel.

There’s little point in describing individual performances, since all are serviceable broad-brush impersonations of the screen characters, with Tom Bennett and Ryan Hutton in the forefront as Del Boy and Rodders. Applause came for characters, not performers, with a warm round even on the entrance of the Trotters’ iconic three-wheeler Reliant Regal (NOT Robin) van.

As for the songs, they’re an odd mix: some are rollicking Rockney (with Sullivan’s opening and closing theme ditties for the series appearing as a segue, second number in), some a kind of Peckham Gilbert & Sullivan (Gilbert & George? No, definitely not), some ballads with the occasional consciously self-parodic rhyme, and one or two classics pasted in from elsewhere; surely this is the only show where you can hear hits by Chas & Dave, Bill Withers and Simply Red. The prevailing emotional register is a kind of lukewarm sentimentality: numbers such as Cassandra’s wedding-eve “What Have I Let Myself In For?” or Boycie and Marlene’s fertility-clinic duet “The Tadpole Song” serve less to give us an insight into the depths of the characters as to suggest vaguely that they do have something of the kind, really.

The evening is basically a polite nostalgia-fest: certainly not for the era, and perhaps not even for the series itself so much as the feelings it engendered – both the warmth and the commonality here are rare beasts these days. In effect, it’s two and a half hours of the moderate glow of a brandy Alexander. The status of OFAH should guarantee it solid if unspectacular business. As for me, the musical has persuaded me that I may yet be converted into a Del-votee, but it isn’t the show to actually do it.

Written for the Financial Times.

Copyright © Ian Shuttleworth; all rights reserved.

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